The Trouble with Masks
by SoloSea
Summary: Tonks was a metamorph, an Auror, this is the tale of her past, her fight for her innocent cousin locked up in Azkaban and her tale of love, loss and possible acceptance. TonksRemus, TonksOc
1. 1 Cries in the Darkness

Title – The Trouble with Masks.

Chapter – 1 - Cries in the Darkness.

Pairing – Tonks/Remus, Tonks/Oc,

Rating – M – Just to be safe.

Warnings – Romance and angst.

Quick Intro – Tonks was a metamorph, an Auror, this is the tale of her past, her fight for her innocent cousin locked up in Azkaban and her tale of love, loss and possible acceptance.

Disclaimer – I don't own any of the character from Harry Potter alas they belong to JK Rowling, there is no financial gain here just a love of fanfiction.

Chapter 1

Tonks looked up and around the table, everyone sat in their little groups chatting and trying to forget the danger they were all in, only a few knew her secret and only one had seen it with his own eyes, one was helping her or trying to and another was trying to get her to forget it. Still she knew one day she would have to allow the others in, Harry Potter would have to know at some point and she was damned sure she was going to be the one to tell him, she was just unsure when and how that was going to happen.

Tonks let her eyes wonder over the group that had for the most part become her family, she knew some of them didn't trust her and she knew some didn't know the real her but still they would protect her just like she would protect any of them, that's what family meant.

Realising she was being watched Tonks looked over to the corner where Professor Severus Snape sat, he didn't smile or sneer he just looked at her in the depressive way he looked at everyone, she knew he would want to talk to her when everyone was leaving, he always did.

Tonks tale started on the fateful night that Lily and James were killed, she knew she was a metamorph and would entertain Harry and others with her ability, so far Tonks life was pretty normal, yes she had a morphing ability but nothing out of the ordinary had happened, Tonks knew her family had a bad people in it but it also had good people like her cousin Sirius whom she adored. When Voldemort killed Lily and James and Sirius was thrown in Azkaban Nymphadora's world collapsed for more then one reason, not only had one member of her family who she trusted and loved above all others been imprisoned in a hell like place but he was innocent and she knew it.

Tonks remembered that night vividly, not that she could forget it, not many people knew this and that was fine by Tonks but on the night of the Potter's death and the miracle of the boy who lived Tonks was also there, its true that the Potter's had a secret keeper but Tonks was allowed to visit Harry and play with him, being stuck in the house all day and night was not exactly entertaining even if your parents were apart of the magic community.

Tonks was young only about six but she loved playing with Harry and on the day of the attack she was playing with him in his room, she watched as Voldemort killed Lily and tried to kill Harry. Tonks had tried to stop Voldemort but was of course no match for him, he however did not kill her but cursed her while laughing, no one knew the curse he had used and no one knew how to counter it, since that day forward Tonks was cursed though not many could tell, the curse created a clumsy effect, she would trip, knock in to things and generally be clumsy, it would seem to be a trait of her character but only she and a few others knew differently.

Every time she tripped or spilt something, every time she bumped into or knocked over something she remembered it, him, those eyes and the feeling of pain, the feeling of helplessness and the feeling of truth, she knew there was no way Sirius had been involved but no one would believe a six year old no mater how much she protested.

After the incident they found her cuddling Harry while hiding in the cupboard in his room, she had Lily's wand clutched in her hand and refused to let go of Harry to anyone even Dumbledore. The wizards had found James body downstairs and Lily's in the bedroom, Dumbledore knew not to force her to let go of Harry but after a while she had come out of the cupboard and given Dumbledore the wand but was still refusing to give up Harry. Hagrid arrived and for some reason Tonks seemed to trust the gentle half giant, when he promised not to harm Harry but keep him safe Nymphadora gave up her bundle to him. With the release of protection the weight of what had happened finally took over her and she began to panic, seeing this Dumbledore cast a sleep charm over the child and lifted the girl into his arms flooing to St Mungos hospital.

The next few days were a blur to her, she had woken up screaming and had many potion to drink, her parents had been by her bedside the entire time though her mother she was sure was annoyed with her and her father was confused about everything. Dumbledore had visited her once to make sure she was okay and even Hagrid had come to see her and assure her the boy was safe.

After a few days of being awake the decision to tell her about Sirius's involvement was made after her insistent questioning about his whereabouts, though they broke it to her gently her refusal to believe it wore thin after a while and her mother even refused to visit her until she had accepted the truth about her dear cousin.

Being a metamorph had its advantages and on the day of his trial Nymphadora was able to slip out of St Mungo's by posing as the daughter of a visitor, she changed her hair and was not stopped, she managed to use the same trick to get into the Ministry of Magic, being six also had its advantages as no one questioned her presence assuming she was with her parents.

While in the hospital she had pretended to be asleep and listened to the conversations around her, she found that people spoke more openly when they thought she was asleep, she had learnt the day of Sirius trial and the room number, bravely she decided to go and fight for him, plead his innocence do anything to stop him going to Azkaban. Once in the building she managed to find her way to the right level and the right room, she entered and looked around; it was still early so she knew she had time to find a good hiding spot.

After a while she heard footsteps and held her breath preying that the spot under the rows of benches was hidden enough so no one would notice her but give her a good view, she was sure the people at the hospital would be looking for her but they would never think to look for her here. She recognised some people and knew the faces of others from the papers her mum would buy, Dumbledore walked close to her but she held her breath and although he seemed to stop by her he didn't look at her and seemed to concentrate more on the others around him. It seemed to take ages for everyone to enter and take their seats, she heard whispered conversation about the 'boy who lived' and the downfall of 'you know who' after a while a hush came over the gathering and events seemed to be starting, she glanced over at Dumbledore and recognised the man sat next to him as Alistor Moody or 'Mad-eye' as she had affectionately called him on their first meeting, he seemed to scare other people but she didn't see why, yeah he looked a bit weird but apart from that he amused her.

Nymphadora looked up at him again through the crack in the seats and was shocked to find his 'mad eye' was staring straight at her, he leaned over and whispered to Dumbledore who turned and looked in her direction. Frozen in fear at being found out Nymphadora didn't see a chamber being raised from the floor in the centre of the room, within the chamber shackled and surrounded by spikes was her beloved cousin though she could hardly believe it. He was dishevelled and hollowed he looked like a shell with dead cold eyes, she had never seen him or anyone looking so lost, the trial started and after a few minutes she could tell this wasn't going to be a fair trial, everyone kept shouting accusations at her padfoot and no one was listening to his answers.

After a few more minutes Sirius began to crumble and Nymphadora couldn't take it anymore, just as she ran from her hiding spot Mad Eye Moody also jumped up, she managed to get to the cage before anyone could stop her, it took him a moment to react but suddenly Sirius seemed to see her and she saw his eyes come alive with emotion of happiness and pain.

She had no idea what to say or do so she just clung on to the bars and stared at him, she felt someone come up behind her and try to get her to let go but she wouldn't budge, all seemed to have gone quiet as if everyone wanted to hear what was going to happen. She smiled at him and lent her forehead against his, when she did speak it was barely above a whisper, "I believe in you, I will never stop believing in you Siri." At the mention of his nickname his eyes seemed to go cold again and he let go of the bars and moved back slightly, when he spoke his voice was as cold as his eyes "Take her away, this is no place for a child.".

Nymphadora couldn't believe it; her childish mind had made her believe that just seeing him again would make everything all right, as if her belief in him would put everything back to normal. Tears ran down her face as Moody pulled her away from the cage, she screamed his name one last time and he looked at her, for an instant she saw him again and she knew she would not stop fighting for him.

Moody placed a sleep charm on her and she did not see the screams and insane shouts of Sirius to get her out of the place, he struggled so much he had to be taken away and the trial suspended for a few hours. Once Nymphadora came around she was at the hospital again and had a magical spell so she couldn't leave her room until it had been lifted, her mother became even angrier at her and although she was relieved that her daughter was safe Nymphadora felt that she had lost something in the relationship with her mother but that pain was nothing to the pain she felt about losing Sirius, no one seemed to understand when she tried to explain his innocence. After a few days she was released from the hospital and was told that she would have a visit from a Professor of Hogwarts who specialised in curses and potions, Professor Severus Snape would try and help revert what ever curse had been placed on her.

_This story has a fair few chpters written already and I think it is shaping up to be a good story so please hang in their, it does get better._

_SoloSea_


	2. 2 Sid the Squid

Title - The Trouble with Masks.

Chapter – 2 - Sid the Squid.

Pairing – Tonks/Remus, Tonks/Oc,

Rating – M – Just to be safe.

Warnings – Romance and angst.

Quick Intro – Tonks was a metamorph, an Auror, this is the tale of her past, her fight for her innocent cousin locked up in Azkaban and her tale of love, loss and possible acceptance.

Disclaimer – I don't own any of the character from Harry Potter alas they belong to JK Rowling, there is no financial gain here just a love of fanfiction.

Chapter Two

It was night time and once again Nymphadora was out of bed and wondering the grounds of Hogwarts, she was in her second year at Hogwarts but it already felt like home, she didn't know why but it seemed to sooth her mind, as if the air had a calming spell in it. It was also the spectacle of the great 'sea squid' basking on the water in the moonlight that made her come out this night, she knew it was a sight that not many people got to see and she appreciated every moment of it.

She sat down on the river bank and lent against a tree, gazing up at the full moon her thoughts went to Remus, she hadn't spoken to him in a long time but after she figured out his secret her heart always went out to him around the full moon.

The last time they spoke he told her to stop being so childish and accept the facts of Sirius's guilt, she had responded by yelling at him that he is the one who needed to grow up and remember what the word friend meant. He didn't yell or scream back at her he just turned and left quietly, no door slamming or anger just silence. She knew she shouldn't have brought up the subject of Sirius considering it was only a day before the full moon and he was already feeling drained but he did know how to get her worked up, she hated how he acted as if Sirius never even existed.

A week later she had gone back to his house to apologise, he wasn't in but as she was leaving he was walking down the street towards her, he stopped and stared at her before turning and walking away, it was the same with everyone she had known, one by one they all turned away from her. Sometimes she couldn't understand why her belief in Sirius being innocent would be so painful to hear when his guilt was decided so quickly.

Remembering the promise she made to Sirius about always believing she smiled sadly and knew their time to meet again was nearly upon them, she was brought out of her thoughts by the sound of breathing she stood quickly and turned around to find no one there, slowly she walked around a bit before turning back to the waters edge, there stood before her was a magnificent creature, a centaur, she gasped in awe and stood transfixed before taking a step towards him. When he spoke to her his voice was deep and she could feel the rumble in the ground as if it was talking with him.

"These grounds at night are no place for a child, return to the safety of the castle young one, they are looking for you."

Nymphadora just stared at him for a moment before realising she was being rude.

"Forgive my silence, I have never met of your kind before."

Nymphadora wasn't sure but she but she could swear he smiled at the comment he walked towards her and bend down slightly to look in to her eyes, she didn't step back or break eye contact but she felt him try to enter her mind, she denied him and forced him out, he smiled at her.

"You are powerful young one, what secrets do you protect in these darkening times?"

"It is not the times that are getting dark, it's the people."

Firenze looked over her shoulder and she turned as Dumbledore, Hagrid and Professor Snape entered the small clearing, sighing she looked up to the centaur.

"Guess I have to leave now, it was interesting meeting you…."

"My name young one is Firenze and it was a pleasure meeting you, Miss Tonks."

Slightly taken back that Firenze knew her name she could only stand there when he lent down and whispered in her ear, she smiled and looked up as Hagrid stepped forward ready to defend an attack but it was not necessary as Dumbledore stepped forward and spoke up.

"Nymphadora, please go with Professor Snape to my office, I will be along shortly to have a word with you."

A feeling of dread set in, a conversation with Dumbledore usually ended with her defending her belief in Sirius, she already felt drained and didn't know if she could face him. As she left she looked over her shoulder and was Dumbledore and Firenze in deep conversation.

After being berated and sneered at by Professor Snape Nymphadora found herself alone in Dumbledore's office, sat in the big chair waiting for him seemed to last forever before long curiosity and boredom got the better of her, she got up and walked around examining a few things when she tripped over almost smashing a few fragile looking objects. After almost destroying his office Nymphadora decided to stick to sitting in the chair, Fawkes had been woken up by her crashing around and called to her in his musical tone, Nymphadora screwed up her nose and slowly transformed her face to match in a similar shape the beak of the phoenix.

Over the years of course she had practiced changing her face but animals were a tricky subject, give her a picture of any person and she could mimic them almost instantly but animals were harder, her physical form had not stopped growing yet so she couldn't change it massively, but her face, she had practiced cat and dog, rabbit and even changing her tongue to that of a snakes but Fawkes was a challenge getting the beak just right.

"Changing face but always the same eyes."

She spun around looking for the person but her eyes rested on the tatty old hat that was brought out once a year to place the new students in their houses, it was a horrid experience she did not want to relive.

"Don't you get lonely up here all by yourself?"

"With the portraits and Dumbledore as company who could ever get lonely, besides I have to think of a new song for the next year, it's not easy being original you know."

"Can I ask you a question, why did you put me in Hufflepuff house?"

"I remember your placing, you were very rude to me, you did not ask me not to put you in Slytherin you threatened to shred me if I did not place you in another house. Now don't lie to me girl."

After a moments hesitation she complied to answer his question.

"I was scared, if I had been put into Slytherin then it would have been true, someone once said, "Bad blood will out", I can't believe they thought Sirius was guilty but to believe blood could decide a persons future was too much, I was determined that I would not turn out like the rest of the my family, being put in Slytherin would have made my them right about blood, that would have been too much."

"What I have thought about many a time is not that you didn't want me to put you in Slytherin, that is a common request, you also asked me not to put you in Griffindor why was that?"

She was silent for a while feeling stupid about having to explain herself to a tatty hat but she felt bad about threatening him and did want to know what house she was truly meant to be in.

"Not to be placed in Slytherin would have been a blessing but to be placed in Griffindor would have been insulting to everyone who has been in the house before, including Sirius, I could not have done that."

"If the choice had been up to me the House I would have put you in would have been that of Griffindor, you have a brave soul little one, your courage has been evident since you were a babe in arms and your loyalty, even if it is to one who does not deserve it, is unbreakable."

Quietly she spoke still not believing that Griffindor was the house she would have been put in if she had not threatened to shred him. Remembering her fears at being place in various houses led her emotionally to admit her lack of bravery.

"I am not brave, you are wrong, if I was brave I would have stopped him before he killed her, I would have killed him when he tried to kill Harry, I would have been able to protect Sirius, I wouldn't have lost my best friend to Azkaban, if I was brave I would be able ask Dumbledore instead of sneaking off. Perhaps you are losing your touch hat, it is not in me to be brave."

Nymphadora was tearing up at the thought of her being considered brave, the hat made no response but a small cough behind her bought her attention to the fact Dumbledore had returned, she wondered how much he had heard.

"Miss Tonks I believe I have kept you longer then intended I apologise."

"I am sorry for going outside headmaster, sometimes the castle is too stuffy, I just wanted some fresh air, it won't happen again."

Hoping that this simple apology would be enough for Dumbledore to give her a detention and send her on her way was a small hope but still she tried, Dumbledore smiled as he motioned for her to sit down and offered her a lemon drop, a sweet she could never say no to. After her eyes had come back in to focus and her jaw and stopped clinching from the sour taste she looked up to the smiling headmaster. They sat in silence for a while before Dumbledore began to speak softly.

"I believe this is not the first time you have been seen out of your dorm at night Miss Tonks, Firenze has informed me he has seen you in the clearing on a number of occasions, Professor Snape has kept me informed of your sessions but he expressed lately that you seem to be lacking the enthusiasm you once had, is everything okay or is their a reason for this change in behaviour?"

Playing with the hem of her robe Nymphadora looked over to Fawkes who was cleaning his feathers before she looked over at the headmaster, even then she couldn't meet his eyes for long.

"Have you ever sat and watched the giant squid sir? At night I mean, I read in a book that the giant squid likes moonlight something about how it cools its blood, at night time it bathes on the surface of the water showing more of its body then at any other time. That's how it began, one night I couldn't sleep and remembered about the squid so decided to go and see it, I thought I would just go once to see it but once is not enough, the way it moves, it dances it's tentacles across the water and seems to hum contently, its breath taking."

Unconsciously Nymphadora had gotten up and moved to the window where she could see the surface of the water clearly but no squid, Dumbledore spoke up from his seated position and this seemed to stir Nymphadora out of her thoughts and she returned to the chair almost knocking it over.

"The giant squid is a very nervous creature, powerful in its natural underwater home but on the surface it is vulnerable, it will sink to the depths when it hears a commotion, I believe that is what happened tonight but do not worry it will return now the peace is restored. However this does not answer my question about your change in behaviour Miss Tonks."

Sighing through tiredness and annoyance at the fact her usual distraction technique had not worked on the headmaster she realised that yes they would end up having what she referred to at the 'Sirius conversation'.

"I had a dream about him again, You-Know-Who, he was on the Hogwarts express sat opposite me in the compartment but no one else was there, he had his wand and I couldn't move, I could see shadows the other side of the door, people laughing and having fun. He was laughing at me, at my attempt to cure what he did to me, then seemed to take sympathy on me, he said he was going to tell me the curse he used, he lent forward and whispered in my ear but it was a hissing sound, I didn't understand it. He sat back laughing coldly, that's when I woke up and headed outside."

After retelling her dream she just sat there quietly waiting for Dumbledore to tell her it was just a dream and not to be stupid again by going outside. He however sat a moment before asking her.

"When you woke up you went outside, I assume these dreams are unsettling, why do you go outside where you are isolated when I am sure you can wake one of your dorm friends if you are afraid?"

Damn. Why did the man always have to push the conversation in the exact place you didn't want it to go.

"Well Sir, when I wake up I feel like he is still there watching me waiting to see how I will react, I used to hide beneath the covers till dawn but lately I felt tired of feeling scared. I went outside the first time and stood by the dark forest and closed my eyes, it may seem stupid but my going outside makes me feel as if I am standing up to him, to all of them. If I am such an easy target then going outside is my way of challenging them to come and get me, if they are too afraid to get me while I am outside all alone then they have no right to disturb me in my dreams."

Feeling absolutely stupid in front of possibly the greatest wizard ever Nymphadora felt herself go red with embarrassment when Dumbledore laughed heartedly.

"My dear Miss Tonks, I do believe that is the first time I have heard of a person standing up to their nightmares in such a physical way. Normally the nightmares of children your age are of far less frightening things so I commend you on taking such an active role in fighting them, however the ground such as the dark forest and the clearing so near to it are still out of bounds to Hogwarts students day or night, do you understand?"

Feeling a bit better about feeling stupid Nymphadora nodded, for a moment she thought about telling him her plan then she thought against it as she always did she lost her nerve again, Dumbledore seemed to read something in her actions and asked her if there was anything she wanted to talk about.

"I'm scared."

"What are you scared of? You are at Hogwarts nothing is going to hurt you."

"I'm not scared of someone hurting me Professor, I am scared of you"

At this point Dumbledore looked at her questioningly but not accusingly.

"I'm scared of you saying no, I was going to sneak away but I figure I wouldn't get far."

His voice not betraying any emotion of anger or confusion he might be feeling Dumbledore asked.

"Why do you want to run away?"

"I don't!...I want to see Siruis, I want to visit him in Azkaban."

She waited to be yelled at and sent away but was surprised when a cup of hot chocolate was placed in front of her. Dumbledore stared at her for a while having a mental battle with himself before he spoke.

"May I ask you why you wish to see him?"

"I know everyone thinks him guilty and many people have pointed out the fact that I was only young at the time, in their eyes I made a mistake believing him innocent but that night, I looked in to You-Know-Who's eyes and I saw how dark he was inside, he is dark to the very core of his soul, Sirius could never be half as dark as a Death Eater let alone the Dark Lord himself."

She gasped for breath as she finished her plea and when he didn't respond she took this as a bad sign and continued her plea.

"You saw him in the trial, he was so scared, beyond that he was terrified, I haven't seen him since the trial but almost everyday since I have been reliving 'that' night, I just want to look into his eyes, I'm not sure what I will find but I know that I want to look, I need to look, I would rather not do it behind your back Professor."

At the last part of her statement Dumbledore's eyes seemed to twinkle, he put his cup down and stared at her a moment longer as she nervously sipped her drink.

"You have had to deal with a lot in your few years Miss Tonks, your gift to morph was always going to make you stand out but what I didn't see was how strong certain events have made you, would you allow me time to think about your request?"

Glad she had not been shot down Tonks nodded a thank you.

"Now before I escort you back to your dorm we have just one more issue to discuss, you are still having bad dreams about 'that' night?"

"They are just nightmares Sir, sometimes the potions Professor Snape tries on me, the anti-curses, they make things very real, it is not a problem."

"Have you mentioned this to Professor Snape?"

"No, he is doing all he can to help me and he has been working on these cures for so many years, I would feel silly saying that the side effects of realistic bad dreams is keeping me up at night, besides Professor Snape isn't the most approachable of teachers."

"I will talk to Professor Snape about the side effects and suggest perhaps adding a sleeping drought to help you sleep. However even if you should wake I suggest reading a book if you cannot sleep, the grounds are out of bounds at night, understand."

"Yes Professor, thank you."

At least thought Nymphadora that conversation did not end with her defending her beliefs, as they were walking back to her dorm Professor Dumbledore asked her a question.

"While you were talking with Firenze he whispered to you, may I ask what he said to make you smile as you did?"

"He told me that the giant squid was aware of my presence and was as intrigued by me as I was of him. I also named the squid and Firenze said he liked his name as he never had one before."

Chuckling Dumbledore asked what she had named him, at which she turned a pink colour out of embarrassment.

"I named him Sid, Sid the Squid, it seemed appropriate when I thought no one was listening or would every find out."

Dumbledore tried not to laugh harder but his eyes twinkled full of amusement and soon Tonks was laughing as well.

_Not too happy with this story at the moment but will up load what I have written and see if I become inspired again._

_SoloSea_


	3. 3 Potions or Poison

Title - The Trouble with Masks.

Chapter – 3 - Potions or Poison.

Pairing – Tonks/Remus, Tonks/Oc,

Rating – M – Just to be safe.

Warnings – Romance and angst.

Quick Intro – Tonks was a metamorph, an Auror, this is the tale of her past, her fight for her innocent cousin locked up in Azkaban and her tale of love, loss and possible acceptance.

Disclaimer – I don't own any of the character from Harry Potter alas they belong to JK Rowling, there is no financial gain here just a love of fanfiction.

Chapter Three

It was a sat afternoon and Tonks was currently serving 'detention' with Professor Snape, this was the way they had come to disguise her frequent potion tasting sessions with him, he had berated her slightly about not telling him about her dreams as information as trivial as this may indicate different reactions from different ingredients. Tonks had stopped listening half way through and was surprised when she looked up from her position sat on one of the table to find Snape leaning over her.

"I take it from your blank expression you did not hear my question! Do you really think you can handle Azkaban?"

"What?"

"Professor Dumbledore told me of his decision to let you see your cousin, he asked if I thought you could handle it, I told him..."

Tonks cut him off in shocked surprise.

"He is going to let me see him!"

Angry at her for interrupting him he stalked away and poured a potion from a bubbling concoction that had purple smoke erupting from it and she swore she could hear it fizzing slightly.

"Obviously, however I told him I think it is a mistake, Azkaban is no place for a child no matter how stubborn they are."

He handed her the potion to drink ignoring her disgusted face.

"This will make you feel dizzy I suggest sitting on the chair."

After so long coming to Snapes office to be tested on had lost the excitement appeal, not only had she known that he saw her as more of a project, a case study he had to solve, although he didn't seem any nearer finding out what she was hit with then he did on the night she was hit with it. She had given up hope of a cure and just preyed all these potions didn't make it worse or affect her in another way, she however had also learnt that Snapes warning were usually good ones so she sat down carefully before drinking the bubbling liquid.

The dizziness hit her almost instantly and was followed by a nauseous feeling that made her put her head in her hands blocking the light out, this was a mistake as Snape lifted her head up and seemed to study her for a moment before letting it go.

"How bad is the dizziness?"

"Not as bad and the sick feeling, actually I think I am going to …"

As she lifted her head up to throw up she noticed that Snape had brought over a bucket for her to throw up in, when she was finished she was on her hands and knees on the cold floor still feeling sick and dizzy, she slowly crawled to the wall and sat with her back against it. Snape cleaned the bucket and put it next to her. He motioned with his hand to another vial of potion he had, she took it and looked him as if he was mad, he stood and went to sit back at his desk.

"The strength I gave you was too strong, you will continue to throw up unless you drink the second potion."

No sooner as he had finished she was throwing up again, this time however the dizzy feeling made her eyes water and she closed them while pulling the stopped out of the bottle and downing it, Snape took the bucket and cleaned it before placing it back in the corner, he seemed to take no other notice of her but was writing in his book as he always did when they had their 'detentions', Tonks managed to clean her mouth with a simple spell but did not move off the floor, she did feel a bit better after the second vial but was not going to let Snape give her anymore this session.

"What exactly did that achieve, Professor?"

Sneering at being interrupted while writing he finished and put the book away before walking over and pulling her to a standing position, he looked her over again then turned and sat down to mark papers.

"It means you are too weak to have anything more tried today, I will see you next time."

Taking her cue to leave Tonks felt like hell and all she wanted to do was go to her bed and sleep for an eternity but as she looked past the window down to the lake she could see the clearing and felt the urge to go down, she had kept her word and not been out of the castle at night, she had been up to the owlery and down to the kitchens but she had not actually left the castle. Although it was dusk the light was still bright enough and there were other people around so Tonks decided she could quickly pop down to see if Firenze was around.

Not knowing she was being watched from the castle she missed the look Snape gave Dumbledore or the comment about disobedient students, she also did not see Dumbledore follow her down to the clearing.

As she approached the water she was disappointed that the Sid the Squid was not around and neither was Firenze, deciding to stay a few minutes to think about the possibility of seeing Sirius, absently she skimmed stones over the lake and watched them as they sank into the deep depths where she knew the squid must be sleeping.

Tonks had a thousand and one questions running through her head, was she really going to be able to see Sirius, when was she going, how long would she have, would she be able to go again, did this mean Dumbledore thought he could be innocent, would she be able to face Sirius after all this time. A small cough alerted her to the Headmaster presence and as she turned around he entered the clearing and motioned for her to follow him back to the castle.

"I was not planning on staying long Professor; I just wanted to visit again."

"I understand my dear I am not here to tell you off, I have had heard from the house elves that you have been staying in the castle and I thank you for keeping your word. I am here to inform you I have decided to let you go to Azkaban, I was informed by Professor Snape you have been told of this I just wanted to confirm my decision. I am not sure how long it will take to get permission from the ministry but I will back your request."

"Thank you Professor."

Unable to think of any of the questions that a moment ago had been running through her head she decided to settle on silence.

"May I ask if you have informed you parents of your request to visit your cousin?"

"I have not, the subject of Sirius seems to upset my mum and has not been the topic of polite conversation for a long time, to be honest over the years I have found it best to stick to simple topics of conversation, the weather for example, my father doesn't really understand about my mothers history or her family and she seems perfectly capable of forgetting it herself sometimes."

Dumbledore could tell this was a difficult subject for her to talk about and he had heard many account of the troubled relationship between her and her mum, it was a shame and he did feel for Nymphadora, in one night she had lost her friend who was hidden in the muggle world, her cousin whom she adored and had witnessed a horror that no child should have to see. She was strong he was thankful for that but she was also stubborn and this meant alienation from others her age, for that he was sorry.

"She would have to be informed of any decision, I think it would be better if you told her yourself rather then a letter from the ministry or myself."

She seemed to think about not telling her mother then sighed in acceptance, Dumbledore once again was reminded of the Black family pride and he did not envy her task of explaining to her mother that she wanted to visit Azkaban.

"I will write to her tonight and if she wants to meet with me to talk about it I can arrange to go to Hogsmede at the weekend."

"That seems all in order, now I will leave you, however if you have any questions I am available to listen and I will let you know as soon as the ministry makes a decision, goodnight Miss Tonks."

"Night Professor."

To say that her mother had taken the news badly would have been an understatement, the only reply she had gotten from her letter which explained carefully what she wanted to do, was a one line letter telling her to be in Hogsmede that Saturday morning, this didn't bode well, a howler would have been better then the calm before the storm.

_SoloSea_


End file.
